listen to this!Any comments/tips??

"Ohhhh",I groaned.My mouth was parched.My muscles were strained.I felt like I have just been pelted with a metal post on my head.I felt like I was flying.Not happily flying,painfully flying."Please God,cure me from this misery".It was no use,I couldn't even open my eyes.I grimaced in pain and let out a sharp cry.My eye's feeling like 1,000,000 tons,I opened them,slowly.I could see the light yet, it hurt me more.The light was too strong.I tried to get up,it wouldn't work."C'mon Shawn",I thought to myself,"Get up!"I finally got up.My body throbbed with pain.I suffered in misery,though,I fought it off.I slid off the bed.I approached the sink cautiously when suddenly,"Grrrrrr.""AAIIEEE!!", I yelled with pain.My throat was burning like fire.I gulped the water down rapidly.I threw up all over...I woke up to find myself in Wyckoff Hospital.I was on an uncomfortable cot.There was a bag ov I.V. joining me on my side with his friend needle in my forearm.*Beep,Beep,Babeep!*the alarm sounded off.I looked around suspiciously."Ms.Negron!" the nurse called.My mom went up to her.My mom came back with a mixture of emotions."Iv'e got some good news and bad news."I wasn't in the mood for bad news, I was feeling bad already."The good news is;you're going to be just fine when they're done with you.the bad news is;they might keep you for acouple of days."I groaned and said,"what's wrong with me?"my mom sighed and said"you're dehydrated.i didn't react.I didn't think it was a bad thing.I mean, i was only like 7 how could i understand what it meant?I tried to wake myslef up as if i were in a dream.It didn't work so i just gave up.It was a living nightmare.I sighed with failure.Acouple of hours later I was done,and i didn't have to stay!!I was good as new now but it's funny how i felt sick a few minutes ago.Anyway I was glad I came out,I would never forget those four days of this sickness.